Hello Morning Challenge!

OK- Tracy over at Our New Adventure :http://adventurezonetracy1918.blogspot.com/ has inspired me! and I have signed up to do this Hello Morning Challenge.

I even read the e-book about it and now I'm newly motivated to actually... dare I say it.. exercise ... maybe daily... we'll see.

I have trouble exercising because I tend to be happy sitting comfy and lethargic with my Bible through any workout time available. But, I'm going to try! And I'm looking forward to having other people to chat with about daily Bible reading and maybe some inspiration for me to move my body.

BUT-
as Tracy pointed out... I think we need a Diabetes modification for this plan. :) After all, other people can choose to go to bed and sleep all night long. :)

So... what to do?

Well, here is my plan/goal: if I need to sleep in because of late night checks, I will. (Great plan, right?!)
BUT- I will still open my Bible and read something- even if it is for 2 minutes. (I actually often do this already... on mornings like that my quiet time is the verse I read to the girls.) AND- I will move my body for..... OK, 3 minutes. This is a big goal for me... maybe I should make it 30 seconds?

No, no, I'm gonna push myself here- 3 Minutes!!!!

OK- who's gonna join me???

Once Jess wakes up I'll add a button or whatever!

Thanks Tracy!!!!

Don't be so shy!

So, on the day before Christmas Eve I was at the grocery store with my big list getting ready for all of the holiday cooking ahead. As I was examining the strawberries, I overheard the lady standing next to me as she spoke into her cell.

"Well, is she high? She could be high."

My ears pricked up. In our family we joke A LOT about sounding like Jess is on drugs or something because we talk about her being high... my first thought was- 'don't assume it's diabetes. Maybe it really is someone, you know, who has a druggie teenager or something. She did sound rather disappointed and almost ashamed, after all. Maybe someone just located her teenager who ran away from home. Found her on the streets or something.... could happen, you know. Not everything is diabetes, after all.'

I listened-

"She just had breakfast. No, don't correct- she'll probably come down. Just give her a little milk.'

Bingo! Definitely T1D! Once again, not the black sheep of the family druggie. Diabetes IS just everywhere! Crazy!

Since I'd already selected my strawberries, I just sort of hung out looking at the overpriced blackberries and waiting for her to hang up. I smiled- ready to say - 'Hi! You must have a diabetic child! I do too! How old is your daughter?'

Instead- she hung up and said- 'Oh, excuse me, I don't even know what I'm doing!' and walked away as quickly as possible.

I was so sad!
Her face told me everything- 'you won't understand. I'm all alone.'

I debated running after her for a moment, but decided that it would cross the line from friendly to creepy.

I moved on to the meat section.

But, I keep thinking about her. Wondering... I mean, this was my local grocery store... this is someone in my community.

I know some people really need their privacy... I on the other hand, tend to be a pretty extreme extrovert. I crave connecting with others- knowing someone understands and also being able to tell someone else that I understand...  but I guess se didn't.

I respect that... but I find it sad.

The DOC has really taught me how important it is to reach out, to ask for help, to be here for each other.

Talking really does help!
And so does listening.

Maybe I'll see her again.

I won't force my extrovert self on her... I'll behave. I'll just smile.

Well... maybe I'll call to Jessica in a loud voice and say: 'Hey Jess, should we get more juice boxes for all of those LOWS YOU'VE BEEN HAVING???"

You know.. just to give her a chance.... :)

Merry Christmas!

I think this was one of our bestest Christmases ever!

Chrismtas Eve was a little not fun- with poor Jess up until 2:30 AM trying to get the lows under control- 4 hours off her pump and 6 juice boxes later she finally went to sleep! What is with that???!!

So.. we started off Christmas by sleeping in. Sleeping in for US anyway... we got up at 6:15 AM instead of the traditional 5:00 AM. :)

We opened stockings and puttered around for about 20 minutes before Wes and Sophie left for the airport to pick up son Wes.

I had fun leisurely getting our big Christmas breakfast together while we waited for them to return and then by 10:00 we were all sitting down- the WHOLE family!!- to Christmas breakfast.

Ahhhhhh..... as Wes would say- all my chicks are in the nest.
It is a good feeling.

I had forgotten how much our son always has us laughing.

So, then we all opened our Christmas letters. A tradition we've had for a long while now- everybody has to write each person in the family a letter and put it on their breakfast plate.

Mine were especially good this year. :)

Then... finally... presents under the tree
Then a big nap
Some cooking
And off to Grandma's for dinner with the whole clan

Great, great Christmas!! :)

Oatmeal and Pumpkin = YUMMY!

Oatmeal cooked in microwave
2-3 spoonfuls pumpkin from can
2 packets splenda
cinnamon

milk on top

YUM! It's like pumpkin pie for breakfast!

Today I'm baking and cleaning and maybe wrapping the last few presents.... Christmas is coming!!!
Merry Christmas to all!

Diabetes... a little bit of Jesus...

A common theme in our house when we talk about diabetes is how hard it is that other people just don't 'get it.' It truly is one of the most difficult aspects of the disease.

All of the crazy comments people make
The well meaning, but inappropriate advice
The thinking it is 'not a big deal'
Just plain ol misinformation

Well, I got to thinking about it... and how living in the loneliness of no one (outside the DOC) 'getting it,' - it reminded me of Jesus.

Jesus lived His whole life with very few people 'getting it.'
Even His own disciples asked Him 'when will you come into your kingdom?' (they thought a politcal, physical kingdom/rule was imminent. They didn't get it.)

There were many times that  Jesus had to deal with:


All of the crazy comments people make ( why aren't you fasting? why do you heal on the Sabbath, how can I come out of my mother's womb again?)
The well meaning, but inappropriate advice ( should we call down fire on them!?)
Just plain ol misinformation ( thinking he was healing by the power of Beelzebub)

In fact, when I look at all Jesus dealt with as far as being alone and His best friends not even really understanding, being accused of things He didn't do... diabetes starts to pale a little in comparison.

But my main point is this... not only does Jesus know what this feels like- whenever we feel alone or misunderstood, we can know that we are sharing a suffering that Christ suffered.

As Christians, our goal is to be more like Christ, right? And knowing, experiencing, what He experienced is to be more like Him.

So, the next time some one looks at me like I'm are a super over protective weirdo- mom...
because they just don't get it

Or-
the next time someone asks if Jess 'can eat that??"  "Is it on your diet?"

I'm going to say a silent prayer and thank God that He KNOWS and He CARES. And I'll ask Him to fill me once again with His Holy Spirit that I can walk out this journey knowing Him more - in any way that He chooses for me to know Him- suffering and all.

that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.


Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me.
Philippians 3:10-12

The Answer for Everything

So, at the risk of sounding preachy... I'm going to share anyway.

God's Word- The Bible. It really does hold the answers to everything.

The other day I was feeling pretty depressed and defeated.
One of my friends just told me her husband has been diagnosed with cancer.
The same day I heard details about a really nasty divorce situation.

Horrible, horrible circumstances.

Then I went home and the next day I just felt buried in a big pile of the usual stinkiness of life. So, I crawled into my bed and pulled the covers over my head to try and hide from it all.

I really did.

A nap helped me cope- but I still felt depressed... thoughts were flitting through my head.

Bad thoughts, but real ones like:

What are you doing God?
Where are you?
Why is everything so hopeless?
Are we just meant to barely hang on? 
Where is the victory?

Then I'd go into the self-depreciating remarks in my head:
It isn't even your husband!
You're not the one with diabetes!
Your problems are minuscule- what is your problem.
You are such a big wimp!!!

Finally on that 3rd day, I opened my Bible.
I read the designated passage for the day and then some thought made me turn to Psalm 119.

As I started to look through my notes written in the margins, God began to stir my heart.
God said: 'I'm here!'

I felt better already.
And hope grew.

Psalm 119-
it is all about how God's Word is important and vital, and essential and the answer to everything!

Here are my notes :

vs. 1- 22:
The results of being in God's Word
A resolve to do it, obey it
Need to make His Word a priority
Ask for understanding

then a whole list of when and in what circumstances God's Word can help!!! Choose your trial from the smorgesborg offered... truly the answer for every problem under the sun-

when enemies accuse me (23 +24)
when I am depressed (25-32)

My soul melts from heaviness;
Strengthen me according to your Word.

This was just how I felt!


Remove from me the way of lying,

the thoughts in my head had been lies... It is a lie that God isn't going to do anything. It is a lie that I'm helpless and useless. It is a lie that life is pointless.

And grant me your law graciously.
I have chosen the way of truth

Yes! 
I choose Truth- Truth that God loves, God cares, God WINS- even when I don't see it. This is living by faith. A testimony of faith.

and Psalm 119 goes on...
When I need God to change my heart (because I can't do it myself) (33-  40)
When I am afraid and need to TRUST (41- 48)
another note: the psalmist has learned God's Word enough to be able to love it

God's Word gives life and comfort (49- 52)
God's Word is a part of who I am (55-56)
Example of submission and repentance (57- 60)
When held captive - turn to God's Word (61)
In giving thanks, even in trials (63-72)

Remember that God created me (73)
I can/need to encourage others (74- 79)
Keep me blameless (80)

When my soul faints and my eyes fail (81-86)
Even when people are trying to kill me! ( 87-88)
Eternal perspective!!! ( 89- 96)
God's Word is the only thing that keeps me going in trials! ( 92- 94)

Obedience to God's Word brings understanding (97-104)
Gives guidance (105- 112)

Now the psalmist's heart has been changed ( 113- 120)... this is what happens once I meditate on God's Word... and yes, God did it in me once again.

Hope filled my heart. :) 
Joy restored. 

(115) According to your Word- God's Word promises to revive us!

God's Word is our help!! ( 161-176)

Psalm 107 also gives some situations where god's help is the answer... but the other day it was Psalm 119 that God used to restore my hope and my joy.


And we need that joy- I need it. 


Because the Joy of the Lord is my strength in whatever life throws at me. 

My friend still has cancer
Jess still has diabetes..
So many people are still suffering.


But, God restores and comforts.
He pulls me up from the heap, out of the pit of despair, to walk with Him.

Come to Me all who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11: 28-30

Thank you, Lord, for your Word. Your amazing, living Word that can change my heart and turn me around. Every time.

Tired days

Well, we were up quite a bit last night... it's been a little while since we had a run of lows through the night...but last night was one of them.

Since we have to wait a full 30 minutes for Jess to respond to sugar, it takes a while. We had her pump OFF for an hour and a half and still couldn't get her over 100.  She was hovering in the 80s and 90s, so not really alarming, but tiring all the same. It is a big pain in the neck for her too- because she fully wakes up for every night time check. She is an extremely light sleeper.

So, anyway- today I'm tired. Especially since I am still recovering from Lyme's disease- I get tired so much more easily.

So- expectations for today were adjusted this morning. Laundry? nah. Vacuuming? Not a priority.
I took a long nap and I'm going to sit here on the couch until I muster the energy to make dinner. I might even use paper plates.

Jess, on the other hand, just had coffee with her breakfast and continued life as normal. :)
She is a real trooper!

When I'm this tired and my brain is also extra fuzzy from the lyme, it does make for some funny scenarios.

I tried to put the milk away in the trashcan.
I walk in a room and forget why I'm there.
I call someone on the phone and forget momentarily who I am calling while it is ringing!
And I'm now terrible at multitasking! (This is not good!)

Hopefully, I will regain a clear brain when I finish the medication for the lyme- but as we all know, the tiredness is always a possibility lurking around the corner, or maybe more like a constant slightly annoying friend.

I remember when I first realized that night time checks would never go away. Oh my goodness, it was such a sinking feeling. When you get up in the middle of the night for infants and small children, you know there is a goal in sight at least. The goal is for them to sleep through the night and for Mom and Dad to return to 'normal.' Our children were not great sleepers (lots of ear infections) so I had 10 years of no regular sleep.  When Jess was diagnosed I'd been sleeping through the night w/out interruption for about 7 years.  And now sleepful rest was not just slipping through my fingers... but it was being snatched from my daughter at way too young. Jess wakes up for every check, We've tried to do it in her sleep, but she is just too light a sleeper.

This is all getting to be too long of a post.. so, I'll just sum it up with night time checking stinks!! I know it is necessary and keeps them safe, but I hate when highs and lows just seem to get stuck and it always happens late at night.

What is it about girls???

Sigh... what is it about girls???
They love each other to death and yet they are driving me to mine! All the arguing and bickering, the drama!
They get all worked up over the stupidest things. I really think they secretly enjoy it.
So, how do I get them to stop bickering? I have tried so many things over the years and none have ever really worked. We have memorized and copied Bible verses, I've tied them together at the wrist or ankle for hours, I've forbidden speech for hours on end, I've tried tuning them out by singing.... the list is endless and nothing seems to help!

I've only had 2 girls at home this fall and today we bring the 3rd one home... really the 1st one as she is the oldest of the three, but has been away at college. We all have missed her sooo much and can't wait to see her, but- any bets on how many minutes after she crosses the threshold before the bickering triad gets going?

I love my girls, but I can't stand their bickering!!!

Nothing to say... turns out is something after all

So,
I'm sitting here on my second night as a 'blogger,' wondering what I should write... and I've been thinking:
Gee, I have barely thought about diabetes at all today.

I don't think Jess even told me her morning number, and then we rushed off to co-op for the whole day. I did spy her once during play practice casually pull out her pump while she munched on a cookie- but that was about it. We'll still have our usual bedtime conference of: 'how are you doing? So, we need to check later/don't need to check later' decision making....but all day it didn't really cross my mind.
No deep thoughts or quirky vignettes.

And so, I was thinking- 2nd post and I'm a failure at this!

And then it occurred to me-

maybe my NOT thinking about diabetes all day is something to say after all- something to say to all of you Moms that have to think about it all day every day because your children are little.

Someday you won't think about it either. 
You'll have confidence that your teen can handle it. 

Now- I know that means your child will have to do all the work instead of you, and maybe that makes you sad... maybe you are thinking-

'You mean heartless mom! I would never be happy not to think about it and it breaks my heart to think of not being my child's pancreas and I'll never be GLAD when he does it all himself. I would happily do it for the rest of his life!'

But, you know and I know that you can't. For our kids, learning to take care of their diabetes is an important part of growing up- just like learning to drive and getting their first job. Of course, just like other areas of growing up- deciding when they are ready for these responsibilities is different for every parent and every child.

So, because my not thinking about it means that Jess is- I AM happy! Happy that she is responsible and today she took it all in stride. :)

And sure, not every day is like this. But plenty are.

So- stand fast and have hope! Your child WILL learn to do this all herself! And you WILL learn to trust her.  It is going to happen.


Now- teaching them to drive.... that's a whole 'nother story!

So, I hope my 'nothing to report on diabetes' encourages your heart in everything about diabetes.

Joyfully in Jesus,
Susie

Thank you D-Mom Bloggers!

Hello !
My name is Susie and I have just created this blog and my first post will be WHY.

#1 Yes, I have a child with type 1 diabetes and I want a place to chronicle our ups and downs, our life, our joys and sorrows.

#2 Yes, I am a Christian, a follower of Jesus, and more than anything I want all I say and do to give HIM glory- all the credit for all that is good- and I most definitely want to share how God has shown Himself faithful and present in all the stuff- diabetes and otherwise.

BUT most of all-
#3 I created this blog because..... I have a confession to make. I have been a DOC lurker for a full year. I have been following several D mom blogs for a while- I'm just drawn to them when I'm bored or frustrated or just feel alone. Often I laugh; sometimes I cry.  And every time I read them- I don't feel alone anymore.
You D-Moms don't even know it, but you have been such wonderful friends to me- and to Jess.

I didn't want to start a blog, even though I had those first 2 great reasons. I thought it would take up too much time, I had better things to do.... but I am so grateful for what all of YOU have shared that  now I feel obligated to give back a little... and maybe your example has finally gotten through my thick head that this might be good for me.

OK- so not wanting to risk giving Jessica more material for make fun of my long posts (ie: the diagnosis story) I will end here.

Thank you D-Moms: Sherry, Tracy, Meri, Misty,  and Jennifer ! You have been such an encouragement to me- thank you for blogging!

I will try my best to do this blog thing... I still need a profile and all kinds of things.. but for now- I'm going to bed.

Joyfully in Jesus,
Susie